Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Friday, September 16, 2011

S'up, brochacho? A few random notes...

If it's fifty-fucking-FOUR degrees out and your dumb ass is wearing flip-flops, booty shorts and a halter top that shows your gunt, you bet your ass I'm judging you. Particularly if you're complaining to everyone in earshot about how cold you are. You're lucky if I don't flat-out call you a stupid slunt.


Listen up, honey-pie: scheduling a two-and-a-half week vacation in the middle of the first half of the semester makes you functionally retarded. Oh, you're carrying 21 credits this semester? One of those classes is O-chem? You're getting home from your vacation in the middle of midterms week?

"Do you think missing that much class will do bad things to my grade?''


No. Of course not. Not only will you get straight A+s across the board, I bet they'll nominate you for Student of the Year, and award you the Class Presidency.


"Duuuuuude, my weekend started on Thursday night. I'm soooooooooooo hungover right now."

Great. However, it's an 11 AM class that's a core requirement. There's a mandatory attendance policy in place.

No, I will not turn off the lights, close the blinds or shush my lecture voice. Man up and handle your hangover!


The youth of today have no intestinal fortitude.


  1. AND it sounds like not much in the brain pan either... sigh

  2. Yup.... I know exactly where you speak from. I had a student bail out each day this week, and two on Friday.... all for the same reason. "It just too much work!"

    I would like a collage of snap shots.... each an image of their cute wittle faces when the real world rears up and smacks them right in the puss..

  3. If you can't do it with a hangover, you are not a master yet.


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