Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

People who need a kick in the cremaster muscle, part 3,724.

About three blocks down the street, we have a mailbox; squat and blue, it stands in the middle of a block. About ten yards behind it, there's a parking lot. Most (considerate) people pull in to the parking lot and walk back to the box to deposit their outgoing mail.

However, asshats abound.

A couple of mornings ago, I found myself stuck in the middle of a line of traffic, waiting for someone who had stopped dead in the middle of the street, turned on their flashers and was depositing their very large stack of mail -- one piece at a time.  He'd pick an individual envelope, scan the front and back carefully, put it on the mail chute/flap, close it and then re-open the chute to make sure that the piece had slipped down into the box. He did this with about twenty letters.

Meanwhile, traffic behind him was building up, and the cars in the opposing direction were too numerous to allow anyone to pull out and pass the offending idiot. Predictably, the honking began and was a deafening din in no time at all. This did not encourage the letter-mailer to move any faster. Eventually, he finished his stack, went back to his car and drove off...

Only to be replaced by another idiot three cars later, who did the exact same thing.


  1. I dream of

    1. Parking my car in a driveway nearby
    2. Hopping into that assholes's car and driving it a couple blocks down
    3. Locking the keys inside
    4. Not being arrested as a result

    *sigh* I bet everyone would chip in for bail, though . . .

  2. Nah - I'd prolly be sittin' on the dang bench next to ya...'tis indeed wonderful to daydream of assclown comeuppances, innit?

  3. Are you certain that your town doesn't have zombies who are driving cars?

  4. That really should have been an OCD meets Darwin moment.

  5. That is when you need to commute in the M-1 Abrams... :-)

  6. Some people are alive *ONLY* because it is illegal to kill them...


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