Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Saturday, March 19, 2011

The definition of lunacy.

Suffice it to say that the "supermoon" must indeed have sway over the mentally ill; the SMother has surfaced again and is being a pain in my posterior.

It started with a communique from the Banana Slug -- her latest husband -- wanting to know where she was. As I have not communicated with her in three years, I allowed as to the fact that I had no fucking clue, and good riddance to bat-shit crazy rubbish, as far as I was concerned.

Apparently, BS came home to an empty-of-all-valuables house and a set of divorce papers on the table. She took everything and evaporated.

Ho, hum.

Then, the collection calls started. LOTS of collection calls. As SMother has stolen my SSN and used it before, I re-upped all the security on my credit reports and started checking my credit report weekly.

The flood of letters and cards started lest week, asking for forgiveness, money, etc. Oy.


  1. Thinking back a bit, I note my own personal talent for attracting crazy. In my case, the only way I have found to handle them with any success is to utterly ignore them. Quite literally turn and walk away without a word. In one case, it has taken years.... but I finally have some peace on that front.

  2. Oh.... and 'tubing' season is fast approaching! Looking forward to many days of grilling, tubing on the quiet creek, and imbibing fine adult beverages. Your clan has a standing invitation.

  3. +1 to Carteach's strategy of dealing with crazy. Legally-speaking, it beats hell out of the Triple S Method ("shoot, shovel, shut up").

  4. Yeah, but the triple S method is so much more orgasmically satisfying. In the short run, at least.

  5. Perhaps a relocation is in order for SMother. Guam has a very healthy climate. Surely a one way ticket is not *that* expensive.

  6. William, it probably is more satisfying, but then folks in your profession come up with all sorts of inconvenient evidence about how the decedent met their well-deserved end and which ties the corpse to the corpsifyer.

  7. About all I can say is sorry for your problems and I hope you can resolve them quickly. It's not like you don't have enough to deal with on a daily basis.


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